Share a time when you felt spiritually abandoned
Share a time when you felt broken
I woke up one morning, got ready for work, walked out my door and my car was gone. Repossessed. I’d faced eviction twice that year. I was frustrated, broken, depressed, and angry but not hopeless! January 2011 I learned I was pregnant. March 2011 we learned my mom had colon cancer. She had surgery just a few days later and would go through a round of chemo (6 months). My siblings and I met about who would be responsible for taking care of her as she wouldn't be able to work. The responsibility mostly fell on my shoulders. I had to make a difficult decision to break my lease with a roommate as if I could pay my rent/bills and my mom's. A law suit from that roommate came and for months I lost 25% of my income. I couldn't keep up with my bills. I was angry. Here I was doing what the LORD required me to do by taking care of my mother and my world was falling apart. I was even told all this was happening because God was mad at me. I didn't want to have anything to do with a God that would have me go through so much while I was trying to do right by my mom. I didn't go to church and didn't want to. Bit by bit He's wooed me back to himself.
I woke up one morning, got ready for work, walked out my door and my car was gone. Repossessed. I’d faced eviction twice that year. I was frustrated, broken, depressed, and angry but not hopeless! January 2011 I learned I was pregnant. March 2011 we learned my mom had colon cancer. She had surgery just a few days later and would go through a round of chemo (6 months). My siblings and I met about who would be responsible for taking care of her as she wouldn't be able to work. The responsibility mostly fell on my shoulders. I had to make a difficult decision to break my lease with a roommate as if I could pay my rent/bills and my mom's. A law suit from that roommate came and for months I lost 25% of my income. I couldn't keep up with my bills. I was angry. Here I was doing what the LORD required me to do by taking care of my mother and my world was falling apart. I was even told all this was happening because God was mad at me. I didn't want to have anything to do with a God that would have me go through so much while I was trying to do right by my mom. I didn't go to church and didn't want to. Bit by bit He's wooed me back to himself.
Share the moment when you discovered your purpose OR the moment you received a revelation of what your purpose might be.
It wasn’t a “deep” moment. It was just an idea. I believe the LORD does that. He gives us ideas. We choose to run with it or not. This particular idea was called Kuumba. I sat down and began to think and write. Today, I am seeing Kuumba become a reality. I think this is my purpose for this season of my life. I do expect that it will change. But, the one thing that doesn’t change is the purpose/calling of all believers to make disciples. This happened in college as I launched a chapter of an international college ministry at UA. The Lord made it clear that above all else my purpose was/is to share my faith and make disciples. It became clearer and clearer as I went out on campus and did that. Nothing is more fulfilling than sharing the gospel; walking alongside babes in Christ and watching them grow.
When you are hardest hit how do you motivate yourself to press on?
I always remind myself that nothing in my life takes God by surprise. He has walked out every day of my life and has equipped me to go through the hard times and come out victorious!
What have you learned in this season of your life?
Even when we are faithless, He remains faithful for He cannot deny Himself. 2 Timothy 2:13
What advice would you give to those who feel like their story is over?
It’s not over. It’s not over until you stand before him in judgment. Things can always change, always get better. If you wake up tomorrow believe that it will be better than today and even if it isn't keep believing. Hope against Hope and keep walking. Talk to other women. Reach out; be honest about how you feel both with yourself and with the Lord. God can't heal and work in areas that we refuse to acknowledge.
Send me a picture of your favorite pair of heels and let me know why they are your favorite!
This
is a picture of my fave pump. They are my fave because they reconnect me with
my feminine, girl power self. They remind me that I have to take care
of me and it's OK to do nice things for myself :-)
By: Deidre Clark
