Look at me... I'm a pageant girl!

When I think about some of the comments I've received regarding my book I always chuckle inside. I must admit the title came from an epiphany I had while at church one Saturday afternoon. A witness into the unspoken lives of two women I admired from afar. One for the passion her marriage exudes, the other for her lack there of. At the time I had no idea what I wanted to title the book.

I felt like everyday Scott would ask, "so [awkward pause] come up with a title yet."
Me: [squinting eyes, head leaning to the side] ummm... no.

But I had a central theme.
Honesty.
With yourself.
With others in order to encourage freedom of expression.

So when they walked in I knew God had been up all night constructing this one. Forgetting to clear their face of the previous nights adventures the message was in the pudding.

I find that older women are the ones who can remember my title. Which always amazes me. Some of the comments I've received from women over 40 about my title:
"Sounds like a perfume that I'd definitely wear."
"Smeared Eyeliner & Faded Lipstick... Sounds like my life." Lol!
While others, who can't quite get the wording together, their responses are always the same: It's something about makeup, right?

Well on the surface I guess you could say that. But in general the opposite is true.

I'm not a makeup girl. But I will throw on the basics whenever I feel the need: mascara, lipstick/colored gloss, eyeshadow, blush. So for me to write a book about "makeup" doesn't make sense. Might I add I don't have any fancy experience in applying makeup and my cousin tells me that if I pick up another neutral shade she's going to scream. So that's not my forte. Essentially the title has an underlying message that serves as the invisible theme of the book: You can't kiss your purpose passionately with tainted lips. You can't see your vision clearly with blurred eyes. So really the book is about removing this metaphorical makeup that we (men and women) wear to avoid being real with ourselves and those around us. Until we strip ourselves to the bare minimum we will never be truly happy.

I was a pageant girl. And not just any ol' pageant girl but a Preliminary to Miss Alabama pageant girl. It was the best time(s) of my life. I made top ten one year and learned a lot about coming into my own as a woman, with my platform to End Violence Against Women through Education, and as a part time singer beyond the walls of my car and shower. But with the pageant life you "have" to wear makeup. A LOT of makeup so that from the stage you APPEAR "flawless." I remember my very first pageant. I had just moved to Alabama from Boston so here I was trying to compete to become the next Miss *fill in the blank* to eventually become Miss Alabama. Ha! I didn't know ANYTHING about pageants or the lifestyle of pageantry that girls in the south are raised to be apart of. So I bought some dresses... from Sears. Applied my basic makeup. Picked a song and dove in head first. I had no idea how to walk and I had this STRONG Boston accent where the car that's parked in Harvard yard is really the CAH that's PAHKED in HAVAHD YAHD. Lol! Looking back on that moment I was being real. That was who I was and all I wanted to do was help women through my platform. After seeing everyone else get dressed, the fact that I was the first one ready further let me know I was out of my league. So for my second pageant I did my research. I had a pageant director tell me that I didn't have on enough makeup and that I needed to apply more. They said that if it looks like it's too much to me it's probably just enough for the stage.

How many stages have you walked across and thought you didn't have on enough makeup?
How many times have you gone back stage to reapply, reapply, reapply not wanting people to see your flaws?
How long will you be a prisoner of this charade where if you were to look in the mirror you wouldn't recognize the person staring back at you?

I encourage you to love enthusiastically every inch of who God created you to be.
Take some "me" time and become a fan of your quirkiness.
Stand up for something bigger than yourself even if you don't know where to begin.

There's a message, a mentor, and a mission lurking inside of all of us.
I'm still discovering mine what about you?

Heads up!
Eyes clear!
Smiles BIG!
#nomakeup

-Caneeka