Day Four....

So I'm back.

I'm suppose to writing a paper that's due tomorrow but it's only 2-3 pages soooooo I will write here for now until I gather my thoughts.

I have had a rough week; day one started with 2 passings, one of them being my cousin in Ohio, who had a very long battle with M.S. He was on life support for a while and my family decided last Saturday to take him off of life support. He passed on Monday afternoon.
It's day four and I am just going through the motions.
Not really wanting to share all of feelings with anyone; just hold everything in and keep it moving because I can grieve when night falls and work is done.
Ya know?
Well maybe not but that's how I make it through.
I pray.
A lot.
For strength through the days, grace, and mercy.
Both funerals are on Saturday and I've been trying to get my mind together.
I haven't cried yet but I'm sure after tomorrow, after my two tests, after this paper is turned in, in the midst of washing my clothes...
I will.
The flood gates will open and I might not stop.
I will cry for Coretta Scott King and the road she paved and how GRATEFUL I am for her dream and accomplishments.
I will cry because I am able to do so.
I'm sure I will find myself without searching for that which was never lost.
These are the thoughts and feelings of day four.
Are manipulation and influence the same thing?
Will I ever come to terms with the fact that Floyd is probably a pigment of my imagination?
Or rather that's the only place I will ever see him.....

okay.
time to write this paper and study.
for real.

May God forever bless and keep you all.

I am thankful for this day.

I am glad he had mercy on my soul.

I love him for his peace.

He is where I lay my head and my body when I get tired of carrying the world on my back.

And when no one reaches out to rub me on it.

He holds me close.

I thank him!

My testimony!

rest well.
be blessed.
until next time.

peace.

justice